I am struggling with life at the moment.
You would think that being cancer free and having had successful breast reconstruction that my life would be peachy..... but its not.
My way of dealing with bad things in life is to not think about it, just crack on with life and keep smiling but I guess its not the best way to deal with things especially if it puts you in the position I am in today.
This morning, my mind has been wandering and it suddenly hit me, just for a moment because thats all my mind allowed me, the enormity of what's happened to me.
It was like having a cold shower.
It was as though I was standing at a window looking at someone elses life.
Did that all really happen to me? Is this new body really mine?
The mind is a funny thing in the way it protects you.
I guess that now is the time for me to accept that what happened, actually did so that I can heal and put the past back in its place where it needs to be.