Naughty Fell Pony

Yesterday Cola had his routine jabs. It was the new vets second day on the job. I told her straight away that Cola mustn't see the needle because he will be difficult.

She was a lovely young vet but not fast or firm enough for old Cola so the injection was a bit of a trauma.

The 14hh black beast grew in size and snorted and prance around his box with me trying to control him.

24 years old? He was acting like a 4 year old.

Then a blood sample was required. Oh my days the drama that ensued!

The vet got flung into my hay bar and I decided that it was time to tell Cola off much to the amusement of other horse owners.

The telling off seemed to work along with my arms working overtime to keep him still! As soon as he was standing I started to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little bloody star which despite my dreadful voice seemed to do the trick.

Poor boy looked so upset and to cap it all a wormer paste was administered.... not the best of days for my boy.

The vet was impressed by his condition and health although there are signs of a cataract forming on his scarred eye. The bloods will go off for testing to see if he has Cushings disease and I will  retest for worm burden in 2 weeks time.

Today my arms are stiff and painful.

Grrrrr

I have put what has happened to me into a box and sealed the lid.

I can't think about what has happened to me this year because it feels as though I have been living as part of a horror movie.

I might be on the road to some sort of recovery physically but emotionally I haven't even started to heal.

The problem with the box that I have put into storage is that I actually forget what I have been through and as a result of that I expect far too much of myself.

I was offered my "dream" job working with horses as a carriage groom at Erddig, a place which has been dear to me all of my life.

It was only when my hubby pointed out the fact that it was too much too soon did I realise the time scale and I acknowledged what my poor body had suffered. It wouldn't be fair on me or my prospective employers.

So I have the range of emotions to deal with. ... anger, injustice, sadness and a feeling of overwhelming despondency. Will I EVER be ME again?

The strong warrior that I am I have taken stock and regrouped. Getting the job was a huge boost to my self esteem which has plummeted and it's given me the push to develop my career further and in other ways.

I received a copy of the letter that my surgeon wrote to my GP and was stunned to find out that my third breast cancer was in fact a relapse of my second but had returned more aggressively.

I am very lucky to have the NHS and the care I have received (apart from my recent surgeries due to cost cutting) has been amazing.

I owe the NHS my life. I am still alive to care for my boys who still need me and somehow I have a purpose in this funny old world to fulfil.

Week 4 Post Surgery

I had my check up at the hospital today and the good news is that my wounds are healing nicely. 

There is a build up of fluid on one side but not enough to aspirate. They have to weigh up the pros and cons of draining the fuid vs getting an infection via a needle hole.

I felt very sick and tense before my appointment. I thought that I was coming down with something but once it was over and done with I felt much better. So nerves it was then.

I am still sore and moving is difficult but I am pushing myself more now in the hope that by next week I will at least be able to drive and perhaps starting to care for my boy again.

There have been times during this surgery that I have wondered why on earth I ever bothered with having a reconstruction and although they feel totally weird I am sure that with time and as the swelling reduces I will get used to it and consider the pain worth it.

Clippers and Claws

Back in January 2009, I was about to start to groom a dog when I discovered the lump in my breast. I carried on with my job as if nothing had happened but I must admit it was a dreadful time.

Once I was diagnosed with breast cancer a couple of weeks later, I had to make the heart breaking decision to close my business. I physically would not be able to work after surgery and chemotherapy and certainly could not risk the chance of infection.

The side effects of treatments and then a second breast cancer has left me with chronic back and joint pain for which I have to take pain killers. Funnily enough though, running is one thing which actually helps my pain.

I honestly didn't think I would ever be able to work again as a dog groomer and my heart was heavy. I felt completely robbed and even more so when I discovered a groomers had started up in my village.

After a lot of thought and consideration I have decided to relaunch my business again, except that this time I will be offering a mix of mobile dog grooming, on site dog grooming, dog walking and pet care to include small animals and horses.

My pain is under control as long as I manage it properly and take my medications regularly so I am hoping I can do this.

I was honoured to have been asked to organise and judge the dog show at the annual St Peters School fete which took place today. It was such fun and I got a real buzz out of talking "shop" with fellow dog owners.

I have already had quite a bit of interest shown in my company Clippers and Claws and I am hoping that within this year I will have a workshop and I can get my business going well again.

Its been scarey and I am still scared about getting back into grooming after such a long time. Although the truth is I have always groomed throughout - my dogs and those of my friends. Plus its something I love doing with all of my heart.

For a while after my cancer treatment finished I have been acting like a victim.... Well enough is enough because I am not a victim, cancer has not taken anything from me in fact it has given me so much more..... more strength and determination not to mention the wonderful friends I have met along the way.

So there you are.... Clippers and Claws is back!

Hot! Hot! Hot!

We are having a little bit of a heatwave here in Wales!!

I hate it!!!!

It's been about 30 degrees here today.

Couldn't sleep last night.

Can't function today.

I think its because we are just not used to it here in the UK. We rarely get temperatures this hot for extended periods so we don't get the chance to aclimitise.

I have a beautiful black Fell pony.....

His paddock has no shade at all so I worry all of the time about him over heating.

However,

Most of all during weather like this.....

Remember not to leave your dogs in cars .....

Two dogs died this week as a result of being left in hot cars.......